Its Hard Not To.

OK I will admit it, I am always preaching and moaning that I am indeed a bitter and scorned pessimistic bitch but today when C and I were in the ultrasound room and I caught a glimps of his face genuinely interested in my big fat follie filled ovary on the screen while I get violated by a not so gentle technician, I saw hope. For a moment I actually thought that this might have a chance of actually working. I have been trying to snap myself out of it ever since. Common sense Tracey.. trust me I am still bitter and skeptical but every now and then this flicker of just maybe comes across my mind. My projected ER date is Saturday. I am now up to 3 shots a day, luckily my puregon dose has dropped a hundred units since I started stimming only a few days ago. But I am now sticking myself with the supressor and the LH (I will never get this suppress your own hormones to inject fake ones.. I know mine are faulty, but still) Current Needle Poke Count after todays injections is 13. The bruises in my arms from the bloodwork are starting to look like serious track marks.